The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.

Independence is all about gaining self-reliance and responsibility. When we give our children more responsibility, we should also add more rights to go along with it so they learn that both are part of growing up and can be proud that it's happening. Any time we give our children more rights, we should also add more responsibility to balance everything out. It will help them from becoming self-centered. A good time to add these might be birthdays or other events that acknowledge their increasing maturity. This way, responsibilities are not resented, but accepted with pride as signs of growing up. Getting started doing this is fairly easy. Make a list of tasks you think they can be responsible for. Feeding the dog, doing the dishes, or whatever you think is appropriate for their age. Balance these new responsibilities with new rights. A later bedtime, more allowance, whatever you think is fair. Then step back and give them the opportunity to accomplish their task. Don't make approval conditional on success especially early on. The old college try is often a great teacher. Don't hover over them while they are doing it. Leave them to their task as a sign of trust. Don't have too high expectations. And finally, let go! Gradually step back and allow them to increase their independence.